The Engagement Ring

“Hey guys, have you seen Marie’s rock? She’s been posting pics of it all over Instagram”

“Yes! Can you believe she’s getting married before us?”

“I know, I wonder who the guy is…”

“No haven’t seen it. Show it to me….” *leans over and sees a pic of a 4 ct Emerald cut diamond and almost spits the water out of her mouth* “OMG- he must have a little ass dick”

“WTF are you talking about?!”

“The bigger the rock, the smaller the dick??”

“No it’s 2 months income, he’s probably loaded”

“No it represents how much he loves her!”

“You bitches are stupid. That shit’s going to take years to pay off.”

“Well I think it’s romantic and I’m happy for her!”

“You guys, it’s not about the size of his dick, representing how much he loves her or even his salary anymore, it’s probably just the ring he wanted to get her. Who gives a fuck about any of that anyway, you’re forgetting about what’s really important: we need to find out who this guy is and if he has any friends, a brother…? a cousin…? Message her!!”

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